I suffer from something I call the Statue syndrome. I first realized I had it when I had my Lil girl. I was a new mom, I felt like I didnt know what I was doing. I had a small case of the blues and would cry alot. The first morning I was on my own after I had her, I had fed baby and she was asleep by my side. I sat in bed for two hours wanting to get up but froze, unsure of what to do and what I wanted. I just sat, frozen, until I had wasted enough time and could pulled myself out of it. This went on for a few weeks. I have done this from time to time since. But it has come back, I spend alot of my time in my "statue" pose. It really is a bother. I spend alot of time freezing up. I tend to do it when I am feeling sorry for myself! It doesn't help, it will only make me feel worse. This is a daily occurrence for me now. I find myself unsure of what to do and unsure of what I want, so I will just sit and freeze. I will sit at the kitchen table, or on my bed or just at the computer desk and just do nothing, for a while. Im talking nothing!
I am having a hard time with all the changes. Change is a good thing, just not always easy. I am not working any more. I have enjoyed my time off, but miss alot about it. I haven't really made any friends yet. My poor sister, I am constantly in her shadow and depend on her for entertainment. Things are just different,Its not bad, just different. Thats what moving does.
It helps when I have things to do. One thing that I love to do is drive and see where we end up. Being in a new state, everything is new to us! We love to see what we can find. We drove to Sundance on Sunday and really enjoyed ourselves. The scenery was so pretty, it was a perfect day for an adventure. Today I went and did all my laundry at the laundry mat. Its easier to do it that way then at my sisters. I took my little girl with me, and she had a fun time helping me. It was a great way to teach her about helping with chores. She even thanked me for washing her blanket, which normally its an ordeal because she is so attached. [It was MIA all week because we could not find it, not fun!] It just helps to get out and do something, I'm even thinking about taking an art class, I have beat the Statue syndrome once, I can again!
Day by day? That was the best new mommy advice you ever gave me, and I literally had to tell myself over and over to take it just day by day... Can i just say how much I love your blog and I already feel more connect to Charlee! She is so dang cute and you are one 'hot mama' but I guess you have always been that:) As for the statue state? I don't know what to tell you there other than you made me laugh and I have this frozen picture of you holding still and then when you begin to move I can hear your knees crack. Am I too weird or what? Ha have a good night!
ReplyDeleteHi Jewel, it's Eliza. I just have to tell you that I enjoy your blog but I agree with Tara if you don't like it then don't waste your time doing it. For me it's like an outlet and I need that especially since I don't live around most of my family. And it makes me feel like I'm documenting some sort of family history since I'm a terrible journal writer. Also, your statue status I can totally identify with. I think in life we just go through phases. Honestly I have the same thing happen with me. There are good times and bad and sometimes you are just stuck. But hopefully there is always light at the end of the tunnel and I think it sounds fun for you to take an art class! Good luck!
ReplyDeleteI know what you mean about feeling like a statue. When I'm trying not to slip into a depression, I often end up paralyzed. I feel sad, but don't WANT to feel sad, and can't seem to figure out what would help me feel better, and everything seems to require so much energy, energy that I can't seem to muster up.... so I just end up paralyzed. When I'm in a bad depression, sometimes I get past the point of feeling the pain and just go numb. Like stone inside. Heavy and unfeeling.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I just wanted to say I relate. I sure miss you, but feel that there really ARE so many great things about Utah, I hope you get to explore them all and distract yourself from the growing pains of moving. Have you checked out some of the local blogs?
that is hard, and totally normal. So I hope you understand its normal. Hang in there, things will slowly get easier. Im sure its easy to say, but try going out of your comfort zone and meeting new people, that will help a lot Im sure.
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